Playgroup workout!

I had every intention at about 10 AM this morning to go to the gym that I pay for. I was so excited I was going to have 2 hours of daycare so i wouldn't have to run after a little one! Those moments are really the highlight of my day lately. When you are a "single" mom and you are a stay at home mom on top of that, you long for just one minute away from your child. I think he does too though! But anyway, I get there and I circle the parking lot several times hoping that I'm going to find a parking spot without having to park at the High School with no success. Then on to the High School Parking lot, also no success. So with a gloomy disposition I took Kenneth with me to the Mother's Gym on base. I don't usually like taking him there because the last time that I did a kid jumped on his head. But it is nice to have a spot where we can go FOR FREE and try to work off the baby flab. For about the first 30 minutes Kenneth did great, then he got hungry so I shoved a bottle in his mouth. After that he was not happy with being "behind bars" while Mommy was on the outside jogging on the treadmill. So I slowed to a walk and held him for the next 30 minutes while I walked on the treadmill. I almost think that I got a better workout that way.

At 11:15 one of the girls from my Ward came in, and my first thought was, "She so can't work out here! Her baby is a month younger than mine, and I have worked my butt off to no avail, and here she is waltzing in here with skinny jeans only weighing 60 pounds soaking wet! I don't think so!" Then she told me that she was there for a play group that meets every Wednesday. So tired of holding Kenneth I joined them and actually had a rather enjoyable time. Kenneth only biffed it once, they gave me good advice on the whole cut finger issue, and I got to know a couple of other "new" mom's.

So recap, workout = partially successful, playgroup = very successful. Here's hoping that I can make it to my daycare gym tonight!

Strawberry Apple Puffs You Are My Hero!

There are days where i am just absolutely ready to pull my hair out with this new found joy of crawling! Kenneth is in to everything!!!! Literally everything. Two days ago he thought that it would be fun to stick his fingers into the carbon monoxide detector and cut his finger after it got stuck! I couldn't get to him fast enough to keep him from pulling his finger out. My first thought was, "Oh crap! He's going to need stitches!" Yeah, I over reacted, but this is the first time that he's ever really gotten hurt. And then my second thought was, "There is blood on my carpet! I'm going to have to pay to replace it! Housing is going to love this!" Then my next thought was, "Chill out apply pressure and get it to stop bleeding!" So after getting my wits about me, partially because I called Shaena and she told me to calm down, I found some gauze from the handy dandy first aid kit and held his finger, which was a task in itself because he was not very happy about having restricted movement, until finally the bleeding had subsided. Once it stopped I realized that he was fine, that he had just pulled back a couple layers of skin... don't get me wrong it looks awful, but no stitches were needed. After a few failed attempts of keeping a band aid over it, I resorted to just cleaning it several times a day. After the initial pain that he felt he was fine... back to crawling, pulling up on everything. It just cracks me up that he is so excited about this new world that he has discovered. But at the same time it makes me feel even more that I need a break. And as terrible as it sounds I can't wait to get to Georgia to have free babysitting!

This morning as I woke up... way too early in my opinion because I was up way to late trying to catch up on laundry, which I'm still not done with. (How in the world am I ever going to get it all done when we add Paul's on top of it in 2 1/2 months when I can't keep up with it now!?!)... Anyway, I woke up to my child standing in his bed whining, "Maaaaaaammmaaa!" (That is the only time that he says my name, only when he's mad or wants out of bed. He jabbers Dada all the time happily, but my name is only associated with whining.) So I got up and determined that I was getting at least 10 more minutes of sleep, put him down on the floor in his completely childproofed room and let him play for a little bit. I LOVE THE BABY GATE!!!!! But alas I only got about 5 more minutes before I got tired of the whining and brought him downstairs for the morning. It was after 8 anyway, I was lucky to get to sleep till 8. So downstairs I put him on the floor in the living room, surrounded by tons of his toys that clutter my living room now (there is no mistaking that we are parents when you walk in my house), and went to feed the dog. I hear the pitter patter of little knees and hands speedily coming towards the laundry room (Luna's Bedroom) and then crash! He turned the dogs bowel full of food over, and proceeded to think that it was his! I caught his hand just in time to keep him from partaking of the dog food. But the poor dog had wait while I put all of her food back in her bowel. I really feel bad for Luna, she's having to wait until I can distract Kenneth long enough to keep him from getting into her water bowel to get her water. But she won't drink it if I put it outside. So nap time and the occasional moment that he will sit in his exersaucer or jumperoo is the only time that she gets her water. (She is such a good dog, she puts up with everything, and still loves us!) So after getting into several other things I finally put him in his walker and put some cereal puffs on his tray... it has occupied him this whole time, and for once I was able to blog about stupid little frustrations. With no husband at home to vent these to it sometimes gets too overwhelming. I love being a Mom, but I just wish that I didn't have to go through 6 month stints of being a "single" mom! Thank you Strawberry Apple Puffs! You are my hero!

Our Life

I have been told by friend's for a while, that this is a great space to enter updates on your life so that we can all stay connected. Even across the country. I thought that I'd give it a try!

As of now my husband, Paul and I have been married for 3 years, we have one handsome little guy named Kenneth who is almost 9 months old to call our own, and a 18 month old Black Lab named Luna. We are a military family dealing with deployment at the moment. I find myself grateful every day that we are Air Force and that it seems to be an act of congress, literally, to have Paul extended beyond 179 days of deployment, when so many of my Army friends deal with 12-15 months at a time. Still it is not easy, my husband is no ordinary Airman, he is part of a special team of guys who disarm IED's called Explosive Ordnance Disposal. He likes to joke and say that he is a Military Garbage Man, and thinks that it's cool that he gets payed to blow stuff up, and take things apart.

Paul hit his half way mark today, today is 90 days on the ground in Iraq. Only 90 more to go before a plane has to take off with him in it headed back to the West. I have learned a lot about myself in the last 3 months, but there isn't one life experience that I've gained that I would freely give back to have one second to hold him right now.

I consider myself blessed to have a great support network, even though military politics sometimes come between us. My biggest support through this deployment has come from a Staff Sergent, Technical Sergent, and Captain's wives. They have been there, and they are there again with my husband as we speak, and yet at times I feel as though there can be no real trust. But that is life when you have women as friends unfortunately. But I really don't know how I would have survived without them. We have made 3 months fly!

Kenneth has grown so much since his Dad left. When Paul left Kenneth wasn't rolling over, he wasn't talking, crawling, or cruising my furniture, he wasn't eating table food, he wasn't pulling up, or even sitting up. He was significantly smaller in stature, he was just beginning to reach out to us for us to pick him up. Now it seems as though over night he has blossomed into a toddler leaving infancy behind. All things that sadly his Daddy only gets to see through the 30 second videos that my digital camera will allow. How often I tear up as I see Kenneth doing new things that Paul won't get to first hand experience with Kenneth. How often I wish that instead of a babysitter once a week that I could instead hand him to his Dad for a few minutes so that I could have a minute to myself!

The sacrifice that military families make are not always so severe as the life of a person, but it is mostly in missing the little moments that they would hold so dear if they were here. It's little boys, looking at pillows with their Daddy or Mommy's pictures on it pointing to it and saying Daddy, with the spouses who are left behind trying to hard to embed their deployed parent into their little minds so that they don't forget. It's in watching their child take their first step, speak their first word, crawl for the first time, scare their Mom (or Dad) to death because they figure out how to pull up when the crib is on the top setting, have their first experience with finger foods, ride their first tricycle, learn to ride without training wheels, etc. All of the little things that most of us take for granted everyday.

A couple of weeks ago Paul said, "Do you know what I miss the most?".... his answer was, "Touching. Shaking hands, holding hands, hugging, kissing..." and he continued on. Tomorrow I will go to Church and I will probably shake a lot of hands, but where my husband is it is all salutes, and attention. No one will shake his hand. Tomorrow I will go in Kenneth's room and grab him under the arms and pick him up, like I do every morning and give him a big hug. Paul will only get that if something goes terribly wrong and someone is severely injured. And yet knowing all of this I still find myself taking every day for granted. How selfish it seems.